I went to Lillywhites this afternoon after work to buy clothes for gym. Tracksuit pants as I couldn't face flashing my sexy, bright-white legs to those present. It's a proper city gym full of city workers (I still consider myself an imposter), slick metal everything and a TV for each cardio run-the-life-out-of-you running thing. I'll need to find the quietest time of day so that I can slowly ease myself through the pain so as to work my way up to confidently operating the aparatus without fear of my arms and legs snapping.

Lillywhites was hell. No, it was like a collapsing lung, of hell. It is one of the places responsible for the infamous Golf Sales. It was full of greasy chav bastards looking for the latest reject or counterfeit Adidas swag, or sleeveless sweaty shirts and other assorted smelly shit. I got my cheap clobber and legged it for the tube. I stopped by Solomons to get some ingredients for lamb keema. Chillies, ginger, garlic, chapati and lamb. That's slow-cooking in the oven as we speak.

I'll settle into a quiet evening with a cold brew, match of the day and the Soprano's. Do not try anything more on a Monday night.